find me on your kindle!

suzanne portnoy had a fantastic idea one day and generously invited my little blog to come and play. we are now the “sex blogyssey” and you can read us on amazon if you click here – i will add a list of contributors when i get it but for now go and see!


here is the notes about it as written by suzanne:

SexBlogyssey is a Kindle-only compilation of the best erotic blogging, bringing together smart, smutty writing from both sides of the Atlantic. Our contributors write about real experiences and their real lives, with a little fantasy/fiction thrown into the mix. We regularly publish new material, drawing on both new writing and the archives of our contributing bloggers.

SexBlogyssey was created by Suzanne Portnoy, author of  a popular but now-retired blog describing her double life as a middle-aged single mother and entertainment publicist with a lively swinging lifestyle on the side. Other contributors include Tess Danesi, Bad Influence Girl, Joanna Cake, Todger Talk, Kitty Stryker, Mon Mouth, amongst others.

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i wore an easy dress, one of those dresses that feels like it’s made out of expensive yoga clothing.  a dress, in fact, that can be formal or day casual depending on how you dress it up.  in this case i added beautiful oxblood boots and a bronze coat.  i looked stunning.

he looked handsome in a tailored suit and his trademark almost perfect business hair that is somehow perfectly mussed and yet it doesn’t seem to ever get styled…

we met and had dinner at a convenient restaurant.

“i fantasized about you today, there i was having lunch with the exchequer and all i could think about was you and what i was going to do to you tonight’

i feel a little thrill and the slow throb between my legs becomes a pulse.

dinner continues with small talk of inconsequentials, we touch on business and life and food and lust and pleasure.  our behaviour is utterly serene and calm and yet somehow i have stroked him to rigidity simply by playing with his thigh while at the same time becoming concerned that the dampness between my legs might soak into my dress.

suddenly i was glad the winter weather demanded a coat.

we continue the dance through dinner, through a split dessert and on the walk back to his hotel.  we are as we appear to be, two well dressed people out for a stroll after dinner.

as soon as we get to the room the mood shifts.  you come up behind me and reach around to take my breasts into your hand as your mouth drops to my neck.  i fall back against you, bonelessly anticipating the pleasure to come even as the pleasure of now begins to steal across my skin.

i feel you there against my back, fully dressed even as your hands travel down my body and up under my skirt.  you reach my sopping pussy and my lack of panties and you grunt your approval.  before i even know what’s happening you’ve pushed me down on the bed with my legs on the floor and my ass high in the air.

i look back at you as you flip up my skirt and spank my suddenly naked bottom.  “beautiful” you say and your fingers start to work “don’t move” you say as i start to writhe.

something has changed, my body or your understanding of it i don’t know but i am sitting there almost cavalierly feeling you play with my clit when suddenly i am overcome with unexpected waves of orgasm.  i quake there, collapsed and spent from maintaining this awkward position.

i hear a zipper and a crinkle and suddenly your rock hard cock is there against my lips.  you grunt again, a deeply satisfied sound as you slide into my shuddering and soaked body.  i feel your pants against my bottom and realize you’ve literally released your cock and nothing else.

i gush all over your maleness in response and you take hold of my hips and start to fuck me.

you fuck me slowly and easily, the way a man fucks a woman when he knows he has as many hours as he wants because she wants him as madly as he wants her.  you fuck me the way an older man fucks, that easy joy in the moment and the utter lack of rush.  the willingness to stop if you need a rest and start again whenever you like.

you fuck me like a man who knows he will get all the satisfaction he wants and has no need to rush toward it.

i shudder and buck and gush and then you move me a little, enough that my knees really are on the bed and then you pick up my feet.  you pick up my feet and hold my ankles and start driving into me as i stay there, poised at the edge of this bed and resting on spread knees i have no control over.

i feel like i am playing that wheelbarrow game i used to play except this time i am nearly weeping with pleasure. your thick rod fills me and releases me in a glorious rhythm and my mind almost cannot comprehend what is happening!

you are starting to get going now, your rhythm speeding up as you hold my body in place and take your pleasure of it.  i can feel my sheath contracting around you and urging you ever higher as you drive and drive and drive your growing cock into my sopping body. i hear my juices as you slap against them, the wet splat of your balls hitting my clit aurally turning me on even as the feeling of your testicles slapping me drives me closer and closer to the edge.

i am helpless, lost in the throes of passion as you take my body and drive us both, take me utterly and then, mercifully, just when i think i cannot stand it another second i feel myself convulse and contract and cry out as i erupt all over your throbbing cock.  i shudder and shake and my internal walls slap you and throb against you as my whole body pulses and leaps at the driving rhythm.

more fluid spurts out and i feel it leaving my body in small gushes with every stroke of your magnificent penis and then one last time you thrust home and i feel you against me, suit pants against my thighs and cock buried deep in my body.  when i realize that i am naked to your gaze except for the dress up around my armpits and that you are still fully dressed i pulse and have a lovely aftershock at what a delightful little slut i am turning out to be.


the beast has awakened.

yesterday i had pheremone sex.  you know, the sex where technique doesn’t matter because there’s so much damn chemistry that if he looks at you sideways you’re going off.  pheremone sex, where you kiss and the earth slows down because suddenly all you can do in the world is kiss.

where somehow there you are against the wall of your entrance way with your shirts off and your hands down his pants and your pussy dripping all over his fingers.  you can’t even move your pelvis you’re so locked in to the moment and the movement of each other’s hands.  your jeans are sitting about three inches lower than his hands and your legs are spread as wide as you can make them.  his pants are off just enough that you can almost stroke his balls but not quite.

clothing is all over the floor around you and he begs to taste you.  how do you say no with lust raging and juices flowing?  with breath dropped deep in your chest and legs shaking and pussy pulsing all you can do is moan your acquiescence and then somehow, somehow you’re naked on your bed with a man doing things to your body that should be illegal.

things that would most certainly arouse if another man were doing them but that here, here because of the crazy chemistry that comes along so rarely, here you’re flying and coming practically before his mouth hits your throbbing clit.

somehow you have to fuck him.  of course you do after he finishes so sweetly with a tiny little kiss to the tip of your clitoris.   a tiny little tender kiss of thanks to your body for allowing him to feast and play.

of course you have to fuck him, you have to fuck him and you feel your body quicken and shake and your eyes meet and you just know that if you keep doing this the two of you will have the most earth shattering sex of your lives.  it won’t be today, today is still new and unsure and nerves and potential.  it’s all there, you can feel it waiting just there at the edge of the pretty awesome sex you’re having *right now*

you can feel the future sex, the wonder and the awe and the ease of it.  the way your bodies will fit and flow with each other… the way they already do and yet with so much more to come.  somehow, while you’re having the awesome sex you’re also feeling the future sex and you very nearly come together it’s so damn amazing to find a partner who plays that tune with your body.

a partner where the duet is better than the sum of two solos.  a partner who likes to dance your body like a violinist playing a concerto will naturally inspire so much from the instrument in question after all.

but, you see, once is never enough.

once is simply the spark that lights the pilot that allows the stove to turn on.

the whetting of the whistle.

the turn of the key to turn the starter to turn the motor to start the car.

oh dear god the beast is awake

the beast is awake and my body is throbbing and all i want is him inside me again and again and again in any way you can imagine.  i want to use his body and be used by him and cry and moan and sob and gag and scream with him and i want it yesterday!

i haven’t even tasted him yet!  wrapped my mouth around his luscious cock and heard him pant and moan and groan as i worship his cock and ravish him with my hands and mouth.  i haven’t even claimed him yet and all i can imagine is more and more and more…

oh my universe, the beast is awake.

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he said as he came through the door.  she backed away from him and into the wall behind her,  “hi” she said as her back hit the wall and she stared at him wide eyed.  his hands splayed on either side of her head, framing her face and her wild hair as she looked back at him, breath quickening in her throat.

he leaned closer, loomed there and sensed her face the way a cat might if he didn’t have whiskers.  eyes slitted nearly shut he traced her aura with his cheekbones and breathed her air through his nostrils.  she eyes fluttered closed and he was kissing her, kissing her with days of pent up passion. “i’m still mad at you” he growled as he dove back into her mouth.

“i know” she whispered as she licked and nibbled his jaw and ear and exhaled moistly into his neck “i know…” she whispered again and sighed, resting her head on his chest a moment.  he caught her hair, big hands framing her face as he pulled her back to kiss him again.

he paused again, looked at her, long and straight in the eyes, looked at her and shook his head once before he shrugged and went back to ravishing her mouth.  there was something extra in those kisses, an extra heat she understood but couldn’t explain.

her hands clasped his back and pulled him to her, pulling his shirt from his pants and yanking at the buttons, his dropped to her buttocks and a long finger slid, once, along her cleft.  he laughed as she jumped and moaned into his mouth.  his hands slid down to grasp the bottom of her skirt even as she reached for his belt, slowly he started to tease the skin at the inside of her thighs, just where her skirt had sheltered her all day.

she jumped and nearly bit his tongue but her hands never stopped working on his belt and then button and finally zipper.  so many barriers!  she nearly mewled with impatience, pent up with frustrated need and want of him.  her skirt was up at her hips now, he had managed it without her even noticing.

once more he reached to clasp her buttocks, circled around and traced the ticklish line at their base.  she jumped a little but nonetheless managed to free him from his nest of clothing.  she freed him to leap, erect and huge and staring right at her with one great eye and once again marveled at this man’s naked beauty.

she pushed the fabric off his hips and he shimmied and danced in place and finally kicked the mess away before he stepped forward to press his naked lower body against her own.  both still with their shirts on and yet not really caring he reached down and picked her up just like that, picked her up and she wrapped her legs around him and there he was halfway inside her just like that.

he paused a moment, paused to let her welcome his girth once more, paused just for a second to reposition her against the wall and then he slid home.  slid home and sat there with his tongue dancing in her mouth and his cock riding high in her pussy.  slid home and just lived there to remind her that he could have let this go, could have never been there again.

slid home and sat for that one moment and then she felt him let it go, let the anger and the hurt go and then there was only this, their bodies entwined and dancing together and it was so good.  so much better than she even remembered.

they danced and cavorted, her back lived on that wall for an age or a moment and then he lifted her off it and walked them in to her room.  he set her on her feet then, just for a moment.  set her down and kissed her once more as he stripped her shirt and his from their bodies.  her skirt presented him with a moment’s pause but he vanquished it and then he gently pushed her back on to the bed.

he paused on his way to join her to kiss her center.  kiss it and lave it with attention until she cried out for him and he laughed and slid home once more.

she tasted herself on his lips then as their bodies danced anew.

tasted herself and felt her clitoris rub across the nubs of his pubic hair and him rock her g-spot and she screamed.  just like that she screamed and spasmed around him and he stared, astonished as her frantic motions drew him into his own wholly unexpected release.  he shouted with her, felt himself clench and breathed it away, willed it away and lost it as he spurted deep inside of her and her body rocked and shuddered in response.

she laughed and stroked his head as they collapsed in a heap “welcome back, would you like some water before round two?”


you said something to me the other day, in email.  said it and probably forgot it; i mean really, who thinks much about that kind of comment?  “I wish I had spent the afternoon in bed with you.  Bent over-ahh, love to see it slide into you and stretch you.”  that’s a little bit of nothing that is.

and yet.

and yet instantly i had an image of myself kneeling on the bench at the foot of the bed from our last hotel room.  a bench we never got around to using.  a bench that is very well padded and rests against a king size bed with lots of room for wet spots.  a bench that is the exact correct height for me to rest on as you pound me.

and i want you to pound me.  i don’t want you to be nice and gently and make love to me.  hell i don’t even care if you reach around with your hand and flick my clit

nope, i want you to take your giant cock and slam it into my dripping hole and then do it again and again and again until i’m mindless with lust and you’re so close to coming you can’t believe how hard and big you are as you watch yourself fuck me over and over again.

i want those heavy swinging testicles of yours to slap my clit with every shot, to slap and hit and tease until i’m so wet that not even a condom can suck the moisture out of my pussy.  so wet that i hear a wet slap every time you slide home.  so wet that anything that touches me is drenched and shiny from my juices.

i want you to hold my hips and fuck me like a blow up doll; fuck me like my pleasure is irrelevant to yours, like i’m just a convenient hole for you to use. fuck me and fuck me and fuck me again until i’m lost in a haze of pheremones and sex and you can do anything you like to me.

i can already feel your cock slamming into my throbbing and ready body; feel you stretching me and sinking yourself in to the root.  feel myself quivering and coming so hard around your cock that it’s all you can do not to come.  feel your fingers mashing my breasts hard enough to bruise and pinching my nipples between your thick fingers.

feel you using my body for your pleasure and hitting the roof of my vagina with every thrust.

i can even feel you greasing one of those thick fingers of yours in lube and shoving it hard and fast into my winking pink rosebud.  feel your finger sliding in and out in a rhythm that doesn’t quite match the thrusts of your giant cock.  feel you stretching my ass and knowing what you intend and still just screaming with lust and want.

feel you spreading my legs wider and wrapping an arm around my hips and then a second and driving me on and off your cock until suddenly, dripping with my juices, you pull out and slide your finger out of my anus at the same time.  i tense briefly, oh so briefly and then relax and you laugh and ready yourself.

you flirt with my rosebud, press in just a little and then release, press in a little and release.  i feel you squirt more lube, this one thicker and heavier and then with one hand around my hips and the other guiding your throbbing member you pull my quivering ass on to your cock.  slow, so slow you slide inch by long thick inch into my innocent little asshole.

inch by inch until i’m screaming and thrusting myself against you you slide yourself into my body.

i’m not sure i’ve ever felt so full in my life and still i feel your big heavy balls tickling my clit as you fuck my ass.

little gushers are erupting from my pussy now and trickling along my channel to my clit or rolling down my legs.  i feel my juices flowing from my body and find myself getting even more aroused at the thought that i am letting you use my body this way.

i hear you groan and mutter words of encouragement to me as you slide in and out of my very lubed and extremely tight ass.  i can’t even believe you got your giant member in there but oh god it feels so good.

i am so close, quivering and crying and ready to come  again and you reach around with those brutal fingers and mash my clit a little until i come, screaming and crying all over your still hard cock and feeling my asshole clench and release and try to milk you.  you laugh again and slowly, oh so slowly, drag your member from my body.

i hear the condom drop to the floor and another laugh before warm liquid spatters my back and anus and i come again just because i’m so sensitized now that your cum all over my body combined with that one brutal finger sends me back over the edge.

i feel it and i see it and i hear it and i smell it.  please please make it happen soon so i can live it!


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i’m working, sitting there and watching the body in front of me and


i’m back, last night, against that very wall.  the one just across from the door.  the one behind my back when i lackadaisically kissed you good night.


again watching my client and hoping they don’t notice that i just


kissed you and kind of stroked my tongue across yours so you made that little noise that i find both irritating and deeply arousing.  you made that little noise and your hands wandered down the sides of my tanktop even as i reached my arms behind you.

reached and ran my fingers up your back in a way that i knew incites you; and even then i wasn’t really there,  i was sleepy and tired and wanted you to go home so i could fall down and enjoy the silence.  fall down and close my eyes.  i was fantasizing about sleeping even while you were stroking my breasts and tickling my nipples.

i didn’t really notice the heaviness spreading through my pelvic floor or the little pulse, i just know that i found myself taking a step back to lean on the wall.  lean on the wall while you touched me freely and happily; a musician learning the shape of an instrument before he really gets down to playing her.  not trying to arouse… exactly.


went away.  i just went away and left them doing this exercise for god knows how long.  flustered i have them go into something known well, homework review i call it because i am not here today i am


just feeling your way through my clothing and down my legs.  a stroke along the crease of my bottom elicited a moan and a wriggle from me that i hardly noticed so lost was i in your kiss that hadn’t stopped.  that kiss that so easily captured my senses and dropped tingles into that place in my belly.  you know the place, it’s the one that swirls when someone with the good pheremones starts touching you.  the one you wish worked on command, just because.

i pulsed and wanted your magical hands on my skin.  i didn’t care that you were going home or that you had your shoes on; i didn’t care that i was exhausted and needed to pass out, i just wanted you to touch me without my damn top or my freaking floor length peasant skirt.

my skin wanted you to touch it, to keep touching it as you had been idly doing for some time.  to touch it with intent.

my skin wanted


today i am clearly not in the room.  today i am clearly in a daze.  every single time my glance strays to the wall opposite the door, the one in sight from the entire room i work in i just


wanted you to take it for your own and oh miracle of miracles you heard my silent plea and your large hands slid the fabric up my leg and you wasted not a second more before you were playing the centre of my body like it was the most exquisite guitar you’d ever played.

you stayed, your ears and mouth near mine to catch my every sighed breath and whimper and mewl.  your fingers danced on my clitoris and then up and inside my body as you alternately kissed me and listened to me gasp for breath.

my knees wobbled and i reached for your mouth even as you groaned your satisfaction and a rush of my own fluid moistened my leg.  i shuddered and pulsed into your hand and you just kept playing.  i blessed every second you had ever played a stringed instrument and proceeded to lose my mind.

i stood, legs wide and back against the wall as my pelvis rocked and shuddered and my abs quivered.  i stood with one of your hands on my breast and the other on clit or in my pussy or who knows where and shuddered and bucked against the wall while you straddled my legs with yours and held me there with your body.  i think you were even holding me upright because i know my knees weren’t working.

i felt my juices rush from my body and soak your hand and the delighted laugh you gave in response.  your tongue invaded my mouth before pulling back to dance, your lips melded to mine and pressing just hard enough.  our bodies made a circle of two and i gushed again, so much that i heard it splatter on the floor and i blushed and squirmed a little.

just a little because you were making that delighted noise and dancing on my clitoris with those magic fingers, evoking shudders and squeals from me and whole new piles of girl juice.  again and again i heard my liquit hit the floor, felt it in rivulets down my leg and then creeping to touch my bare feet as the puddle spread.

i flooded again at the thought of making an actual puddle.  making a puddle that spread again and even hit your boots i splashed so much. i might have felt bad for your boots if i could have thought anything past “ohmygodohmygodohmygod” which i couldn’t say because you were busy swallowing my gasps and sighs with that mouth of yours.

random thoughts were floating through my brain as endorphins flooded me and i continued to come and come on your magical hands.  my feet were slipping on the soaked tiles and still. still you played my body and danced it to your tune and i loved every second of it.

every single second.

and then you stopped.  stopped because that was surely enough and besides…

and you tore your mouth away from mine and dragged yourself regretfully away from my shuddering body and smiled sort of sadly as you reached for the door.  and then you laughed and said the solo wasn’t done yet and you came back in for one last

gasp and shudder and gush and gush again and tongue sweep and nipple squeeze and stroke and taste and pant and tremble and buck repeatedly until you’re glad your ass isn’t any skinnier and you don’t know how your knees haven’t given way and


i just can’t stay here today, i’m still living in last night.

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sorry sorry sorry

it’s been such a long time since i had any good dating or sexual experiences that i am having a hard time feeling sexual enough to write smut or review toys.  i am, in fact, growing cobwebs on my girly bits.

and when i say cobwebs i mean just that.  i can’t remember the last time i tried to masturbate.  i reviewed some hitachi attachments for pink cherry toys in december but then i forgot to write the review and now, while i remember that i liked them, i have nothing concrete to say on their behalf.

i have some really hot ideas.  in one i’m a girl wearing a shirt that shows just a little more than expected.  in another a girl rides a boy in the best way she can and so on.  i have two toys to review and i’m sorry

i just can’t.

please check back, i will start writing here again i feel this to be true, but right now i need to do something.  wait for spring?  remember what a penis that is used by a man with skill feels like when you fuck it?  have a second or third date?  not date any more princesses?

i am still out there in the dating world although i’m not sure that i should be considering my total ennui with it all but well…

before you mention it i am aware that this sounds like depression.

that was in the fall.  this is… i just can’t write smut right now.

that said, i did find a very special girl to write toy reviews for me… so wait for those at least!


okay, i wrote something, hopefully that breaks the seal.

i love this blog and the people who visit it, don’t think i’m gone forever please!